And now we grow...

As 2010 rounds its first corner, I find myself standing back a great distance, looking at my family. After spending so much time scrutinizing the microscopic anomalies, the confusing little tidbits, the deformities; I find myself standing back a great distance, trying to see the bigger picture.

My family underwent a number of metamorphoses during Christmas. Some of these gave birth to butterflies and others left us with moths dancing around the last light of some played out argument. It was the strangest sensation - feeling my family pull apart at its seams while simultaneously growing stronger. The conflicting forces left me disheartened to say the least.

There's only some peace in silence; solace from the distress of unwanted company. Even in the silence, there's the noise of your own thoughts. I did my best to reach out to my family and talk - if only to say"hello" - and break the silence.

Warmer and warmer. A smile felt through the phone. The heavy hate that lined my stomach finally being cleansed from the body.

I think standing this far back I realize how difficult, yet blessed these last few months have been for us. Christmas began with the most overwhelming, emotive love I've ever felt. Conversely, I also experience what I think it truly means to have love taken away from you.

I say I'm blessed because I realize that my life encountered a natural disaster. It's been affected by time affords all living things. Like wildfires that arise and burn every so often - eradicating the brush and the bulk of forests, destroying life, stripping the earth of its structure and peace. After the fires subside and the smoke settles, the dead decompose and fuel new life; stronger life. A more select and stable ecosystem arises.

From this great distance, I see that mine is rising. My family's is rising. We burned to the ground. A new seed was born and planted. And now we grow. And love prevails.