"Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself"
                                                                                  -Charlie Chaplin

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Nala

Nala is Swahili for "Beloved" or "Gift" (depending on who you ask). Either way, she is both. Nala is my new pitbull mix puppy. She came as a surprise and I certainly didn't plan on having her, but when these things happen, they happen. And as we all know, I'm no stranger to fate.

Having Nala also represents a shift in my life. Like the "reset button" in 2011, this attitudinal change in my life is both welcom and necessary. Don't get me wrong, I love being 24 and going out and being crazy, but that will always be there (or at least for the next twenty years if West Hollywood is any indication). With so many factors in my life demanding a greater focus, Nala is one of things I now feel more responsibility towards.


MMM is another area in which my focus grows with greater focus and attention. As I said before, I see this year as our keystone year. That's only going to become a reality with true focus. I've begun the process of truly moving this company forward, reaching out to other businesses for advise and government organizations for direction and aid in getting started. Taking seminars and classes, creating a business plan, consulting with business owners who have fought this battle already - there's many avenues I can walk to learn and grow.

My personal life is yet another area. This year I'll be turning 25 and with that I want to secure a greater accumen for personal financial freedom. Instead of spending so much on bars and clubs; I can begin to adequately pay down student loans and put money away. I've also begun going to the gym again and spending time thinking more acutely about my physical health.

Now, let's be honest: while my life isn't rife with financial and physical irresponsibility, there is that sweet spot we tend to hit which breeds complacency. Life is great. Everything is going our way. Nothing can harm us. Alas, in that complacency, I find little groves of rot can form and eat away at my own productivity over time. I don't want to be a victim of my own sweet spot! So, now is a time of small, but vital adjustments; making sure that the pastures stay green, without weeds or rot.

I gladly welcome these responsibilities and I gladly welcome the little, but indicative changes. I continue to pray for wisdom and favor (as my roommate loves to remind me). With one month down in 2011, I feel the tides turning in a lot of areas in my life. I choose to be fully prepared for what's ahead.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

The Reset Button

Just like that, it's 2011. Like always - time keeps moving along and passing us by. It's easy to get stuck in a single second of the clock's endless ticking. Being stuck is easy - moving forward is not. Let me rephrase that: With the inertia inherent to time, it seems like moving forward would be a breeze; in actuality it's one of life's more difficult tasks.

A good friend of mine advised in his Christmas card this year to stay creative in 2011; do something every day that feeds my creativity and mind. So I'm updating this old blog again. It's been a while and a lot has changed. 2011 is dedicated to what my friends and I have lovingly called the Reset Button. Resetting expectations. Resetting our growing list of regrets. Resetting our ability to move forward and break that pesky time barrier.

One of the toasts I heard this year, stuck will me in particular; that is, that 2011 being about reaping the seeds planted in 2010. As the new year approached, there was this overwhelming feeling that 2011 would be a turning point to many of the people I love. For me, 2011 IS about reaping the seeds sown in my life. Whether that means my company and my business partners taking the next big step in our careers, my family and I proving the old adage "love conquers all," or me finally striking the proverbial balance in the very different areas of my life; 2011 seems to be the year to make it all happen.

There was a tangible turning point in my career this year. The completion of MMM's first feature OPUS (my first feature, producing credit), marked the beginning of something bigger. I've seen huge steps in my professional life for which I couldn't be more grateful. I see people trusting my judgement and my experience to get the job done. I feel my partnership with MMM growing and flourishing and, in this, I see a future I never expected.

The same goes for my family. Returning home this Christmas was a 180 degree difference from the last. Where last year, the soil felt parched and hard, this year felt fertile and rich; my roots a little stronger than before. I spent a lot of time with my Nana - who against all odds has become my biggest advocate and supporter. This past year, she has taught me more about love and tolerance and understanding than any other person in my life. I also got to see and hold my Nephew Jackson. A year into his journey and he's already a beacon of joy and life. My siblings and I found more peace in our ages, in understanding and in a clearer perspective of our childhoods. And my parents. My parents and I found a way to not only coexist, but love each other and see each other beyond our differences. The steps may seem few to the outsider, but their span is immeasurable to me.

And my personal life? In 2010, I realized for the first time I was truly happy with myself. I found the ability to truly love myself and in turn love others. I made relationships I never thought I'd have here in LA and am very blessed for my growing support system. In 2011, I hope to see this grow even more - that the collective wisdom of friends and myself will inform my growth and faith.

I thank God for this New Year; for the chance to reset my life and to move forward into the greener pastures of a life well-cultivated. I've been blessed in many ways and regardless of whether things grow into the plants and flowers I envisioned, in 2010, I must remember that no weed is unable to be cut and no thorn is unable to be removed. Time will continue ticking and I will choose to follow its hands and move forward.

Happy New Year!