The New Relationship(s)

re⋅la⋅tion⋅ship

  [ri-ley-shuhn-ship]

–noun

1.	a connection, association, or involvement.

2.	connection between persons by blood or marriage.

3.	an emotional or other connection between people: the relationship between teachers and students.

4.	a sexual involvement; affair.

Over the course of my weekend, this particular word presented itself in a multitude of forms, fashions, and functions. In nearly every sense of the word, I was forced to pry a little deeper into my existing - and subsequently past and forthcoming - relationships as Friday turned into Sunday. What I discovered are two undeniable truths:

1) Fortunately, I learn from experience. Relationships will only get better: the more I learn and experience, the more I grow.

2) Unfortunately, I learn from experience. The past is past and I can't change the relationships I've messed up and the people I've hurt.

Now that being said, I think the former outweighs the latter in a myriad of ways and should be held in a much higher regard. Still, any human with any sort of life experience will tell you that the tiniest drop of 'negative' can poison an ocean of 'positive.'

I found myself examining each definition in the above excerpt, inspecting and defining my interaction and interfacing with....

1) acquaintances, my day to day life, my world

2) my family

3) my friends and colleagues

4) my love life

I think each of these warrant their own entry; however all of them have a few core things in common. I'm realizing on a deeper level the evolution of the new relationships in my life. Whether I met you yesterday or have known you my entire life, there's a new code of conduct that applies to my life and as I function now.

First of all, I'm beyond my "transition" period in Los Angeles. As it's to be expected, any big change requires a certain amount of self-involvement in ones life in order to guard yourself and establish roots and a new identity. Unfortunately, this mechanism of survival leaves many in a the choppy wake of narcism and narrow-mindedness. Like I said, this period of my life (for now) is complete, and I have no excuse to treat any person, family member or loved one with any amount of emotional disregard.

Next, I've was reminded at the sermon this week to always stay invested in my relationships, even when things get bad. I've been a firm believer of this my whole life, but there have been instances in my recent history where I've really neglected this. I've "taken off" from many of my relationships; a few hours can been as detrimental as a few days where this matter is concerned. One minute is enough to destroy even the most established relationship. Ultimately, some occasions will need to end in a departure, but as a rule, I find that the benefit of the doubt and/or a second chance will leave you happier in the long run.

Finally, encourage and value the people you're with. The older I get the easier people seem to turn from one another when they feel their value is treated with disregard. The indescretions we experience in childhood and adolescence, the unsavory actions we permit in those relationships simply do not apply anymore. Whether this is associated with the gradual relief of social pressures or a general wear in patience, I find that special attention must be paid where egos are concerned. At the most basic level, we should lift each other up and support each other. This seemingly simple rule is one often neglected and hard to regularly maintain even in the most earnest friend.

As I see it, the new rules of the relationship will vary from person to person. These are my own assertions, although I do think they hold at least some validity for all. Take what you will. Add what you will. Leave what you will. It's all about experience. It's entirely about you. And it has nothing at all to do with you.

Change

change [cheynj]
verb, changed, chang·ing, noun
–verb (used with object)

1.	to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone: to change one's name; to change one's opinion; to change the course of history.

2.	to transform or convert (usually fol. by into): The witch changed the prince into a toad.

3.	to substitute another or others for; exchange for something else, usually of the same kind: She changed her shoes when she got home from the office.

4.	to become different: Overnight the nation's mood changed.

5.	to become altered or modified: Colors change if they are exposed to the sun.

6.	to become transformed or converted (usually fol. by into): The toad changed into a prince again.

7.	a variation or deviation: a change in the daily routine.

8.	the substitution of one thing for another: We finally made the change to an oil-burning furnace.

9.	the passing from one place, state, form, or phase to another: a change of seasons; social change.

10.	the supplanting of one thing by another.

11.	anything that is or may be substituted for another.

12.	change front, Military. to shift a military force in another direction.

13.	to change hands .

14.	change one's mind, to change one's opinions or intentions.

It's amazing much thought can be afforded to one word. Change. This word effectively umbrellas all the hot button issues of this race for the presidency. The American people are crying out for change and each party is taken note and espousing policies as far from the incumbent as humanly possible.

I just received my absentee ballot in the mail. Now what? I'm torn between both parties, I'll be honest. McCain uses the terms "Straight-talk Express" and Obama presses that McCain is out of touch with reality. The truth of the matter is, these politicians want votes. Will they say anything to get it?

I don't know what scares me more: McCain ending up being like Bush III or Obama not having a clue once he's in office. Time is the only solution to this problem - in the meantime, I have to figure out which of these are more threatening.


Obama is guaranteed "change" - for better or for worse. And McCain promises change with more experience to back up his claims. As the American public we now have the power to change the course of history and transform this country. This definitely is a change in seasons. It's a time for social change, but once the powers that be change hands - let's hope that they don't change their intentions for America.

Register to VOTE if you haven't already. You're not allowed to complain for the next four years if you don't!

http://www.rockthevote.org/